Can Cruise Control Solve Traffic Jams?

I want to begin this article by asking a simple question about your driving habits. If you own a vehicle with cruise control, do you use it regularly? I'd like to garner feedback from my readers about how and when they employ their car's cruise control feature, all to be used for a future follow-up segment. Or, if you don't use it at all, I'd like to know that as well.

Unfortunately, I'm one of those drivers that can be prone to bouts of road rage. Poor driving really gets under my skin. The single highway sin that bothers me the most are drivers that can't maintain a consistent speed. You surely understand what I'm referring to. One moment, a driver is ten miles below the speed limit. The next, they're blazing down the highway many miles over the limit. They just can't seem to drive along at a steady pace. Numerous variables can be at play -- fiddling with their phone, doing their makeup, eating, etc. Obviously, these same drivers are not using their cruise control.

I came upon some very interesting information concerning phantom traffic jams. These are bouts of severe slowdown on the highway caused by no reason at all. There's not an accident, nor roadwork, nor even a police officer pulled over beside the road. Mind you, these things shouldn't cause a traffic jam either, but folks like to rubberneck too much!

Here are some great videos that easily explain more in depth about phantom traffic jams.

With a phantom traffic jam, research has shown that drivers moving at inconsistent speeds are the largest contributing factor. When one driver brakes hard or slows down too much, they cause the driver behind them to do the same. This pattern repeats in succession, causing a chain reaction of sudden braking. Before long, a domino effect occurs and everyone comes to a crawl, or stops altogether. A giant traffic jam is born, all because someone can't drive worth a damn.

Please, relate your personal data about cruise control to me. I'd like some anecdotal context to better understand how and why traffic jams happen.

A Short Note On North Carolina Moped Drivers.

At least she's wearing a helmet?

I watched as a moped unsafely whipped ahead of a line of cars this morning while driving, only for said moped to delay traffic and unreasonably slow everyone down. And yet, that moped is allowed on public North Carolina roadways without a licensed operator.

This is simply unacceptable.

I realize that some other states require moped operators to be licensed. North Carolina should do the same. Test people in the much the same manner as motorcyclists. Require that they possess the proper insurance. Make sure that everyone operating a motor vehicle has been evaluated and deemed responsible enough to share the highway, moped drivers included. More importantly, hold moped drivers in equal regard with other drivers. If they're caught driving while intoxicated, they must face the same penalties as drivers operating trucks, motorcycles and cars. Mopeds are involved in hundreds of accidents every year. Mopeds can and do kill people.

All drivers operating a motor-powered vehicle on the highway must be held to the same standard. Period.

Today Was Stressful.

Stress has been ever present in my life today. Seems like I have been stressed out since I woke up this morning. Not sure why, but it sure did snowball as the day went along. Today was just one of those days --nothing seemed to go right and everything annoyed me in one way or another.

I dealt with terrible drivers, which is a persistent problem in North Carolina. Folks are absolutely frightening here, with the lack of turn signals, running red lights, cutting other drivers off without warning and swerving from lane to lane. Road rage really boils my anger over at times. This is highly unfortunate, considering I enjoy driving. Being in a car and just moving down the road is therapeutic... but only if I'm not being assaulted by other dumb-ass drivers.

Leave it to a poorly-designed game disc to piss me off. I just purchased a brand new Playstation 3 with a copy of LEGO Batman 3: Beyond Gotham. I've barely had it for a month and of course the game started to act up. After going through a few too many tedious troubleshooting steps, I determined that a single, tiny smudge on the edge of the game disc was to blame.

Grocery shopping, as discussed in my article from a few days ago, has become troublesome. Retailers are raising their prices unnaturally, thereby causing me more stress in trying to locate better deals. I can usually find what I'm looking for, but damn if grocery stores aren't pulling the wool over most consumers' eyes.

Apparently, the local Burlington City Christmas parade is just ten days away on November 21. When I heard the news, I became enraged. Though, I have little reason to be pissed off about this. It's not as if I'm even going to attend the parade. Parades themselves send me into fits of anger. Yet, having a Christmas parade a week before Thanksgiving really grinds my gears. What about celebrating Thanksgiving, eh? Why not have your parade within the month of December? Don't feed me crap about it being a scheduling issue -- those in charge of setting the date are just aloof nitwits.

I yelled at Crystal this morning because she made the point that I don't always fully consider her special dietary requirements when planning out meals. She was right; I had no reason to get upset. I take criticism poorly. I was also in the wrong for yelling. The sore throat serves me right, I suppose. Even though I'm not the angry man I once was, I can still have my moments when I'm stressed out. Doesn't make it right, but I've learned to identify when I am most likely to get angry.

Here I am, writing about myself for a change. Yet, I sat before my keyboard for an hour without any inspiration as to what to write about. As I've grown as a writer and tried to expand my content, sometimes I forget that this blog began as a means to soothe my inner beast. Writing about my feelings and getting out my anger was the best therapy I ever went through. When times get stressful, I shouldn't be afraid to speak from the heart. Getting out my feelings is perhaps the best thing I can do to feel better.

I have a difficult time processing stress and letting things go. It's just in my nature to hold onto the things that trigger my rage. While it's almost certainly related to my upbringing, I'm an adult now. Releasing the things that perturb me is fully within my capability. Finding a sense of calmness and balance is more important, especially on days like today.

A Lane Thief Just Nearly Killed Me.

My life flashed before my eyes today. Thankfully, I'm here to tell you about it.

On two separate occasions in the past year (here and here), I've written about the dangers of Lane Thieves. What are Lane Thieves, you may be asking? For the benefit of my new readers, I'll briefly explain.

Imagine you're driving a motor vehicle and have stopped at an intersection, waiting to turn right (or left depending on your country); it doesn't matter if it's a stop light or stop sign. The road you're on is a single lane with no turn lane. As you're waiting to make your turn at the intersection, allowing for the oncoming traffic to clear, another driver behind you decides to pull along the curb, get beside you and make their own turn. This is a Lane Thief -- they literally steal part of a single lane road as if there are two lanes, thereby passing you on the right (which is a big no-no on its own) and attempting to turn out of sequence. This generates all sorts of accident hazards for the first driver legally stopped at the intersection and waiting to turn.

Yet again, a Lane Thief has struck. This time is different, though... they nearly killed me in the process.

I was driving home just a short while ago. Upon exiting the interstate, I come to an off-ramp intersection exactly like the one in the image above. I have to turn right to get home. While sitting in the middle of the lane with MY RIGHT TURN SIGNAL FLASHING, I was waiting for oncoming traffic from the left to clear before turning right. As I'm sitting there, another driver comes up from behind me, pulls to the right side over the curb and tries to turn. As I'm making my legal turn to the right, this jackass decides to turn right as well.

Picture that for a moment, would you -- two cars from a single lane turning right onto the right side of a road. Obviously, there isn't enough room for the both of us.

There is a large truck stop at this particular exit, with tractor trailers coming and going all the time. As I'm completing my turn and realizing that there's another driver to my right, I have to think fast. Why? Because there's an oncoming tractor trailer on the left side of the road and I'm being gradually pushed over the solid yellow line by the lane thief! I put my foot into the accelerator to speed up and get past the danger. What does the lane thief do? Accelerate even faster and keep shoving me into the oncoming lane -- this guy is purposefully trying to kill me at this point.

As the tractor trailer looms closer and I'm stuck in the wrong lane, I have to think fast again. I steadily press hard into my brakes, but not so hard that I lose control of my Jeep. The lane thief to my right zooms by, nearly taking my mirror off. The tractor trailer to the left blows past me, nearly turning me into roadkill. And there I am... just a guy trying to make a simple right turn at an intersection, less than a mile from my house.

Folks, this is the kind of crap I put up with from society. Many of you wonder how I can be so angry with human beings.

IT'S BECAUSE YOU DUMB SHIT-HEADS ARE TRYING TO KILL ME!

Please, for the love of all that's good and decent in this world, don't be a LANE THIEF! You're going to get someone killed. I want you to remember this story the next time you attempt to steal a lane.

To the guy in the silver Dodge Caravan that nearly killed me... I hope your genitals are ferociously snapped off by a rusty bear trap.

Grinding My Gears! - Rubbernecking

Oh crap, it's...

In today's installment of my long running series Grinding My Gears!, I want to discuss the persistent thorns in my ass that are rubberneckers. On the way home from grocery shopping, I was stuck behind a long line of vehicles. Upon reaching the crest of the next hill, I saw the reason for my delay -- a police officer parked beside the road with his lights flashing. The closer I came to the officer's cruiser, the slower the person in front of me drove. When it came time for the driver before me to pass by the cop, they slowed almost to a halt, looked out the window at the officer and swerved nearly off the road.

WHY-WHY-WHY-WHY-WHY-WHY-WHY-WHY?!

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!

After ceasing my screaming at the driver, they continued to putz down the road at a very slow speed. Why? I couldn't tell you. There was no reason for them to slow down while passing the police officer, that's for damn sure. I'll get to my frustration with the cop in a moment.

Oh look, a traffic jam. There must be a massive wreck up ahead.

Er, wait... it's just someone changing a flat tire.

I'm sick and tired of folks staring at things happening beside the road, all the while recklessly endangering the lives of other drivers. Whatever is taking place, there is no reason for you to slow down and look. Don't turn your head. Keep your eyes on the road and ignore the flashing lights. Every time I see some moron rubbernecking, this is what I imagine is going through their mind:

"Ooooohhh... pretty flashy lights. I must turn my head and look now. Doh, pretty lights!"

Congratulations! You helped cause a traffic jam because you couldn't stay focused on THE MOST IMPORTANT THING YOU SHOULD BE WORRIED ABOUT WHILE DRIVING... WHICH IS DRIVING!

Rubbernecking is a leading cause of motor vehicle accidents where a distracted driver is at fault. Current estimates place rubbernecking as being responsible for between ten and twenty percent of ALL roadway accidents. That's not just ridiculous; it's downright moronic. Shape up, American drivers! I'm tired of your crap. 

Now, as to the dumb police officer. Why was he stopped beside the road? I'll tell you. He was staring at a bag of what looked like fast food, mashed in the center of the road. Was he going to arrest the flattened french fries? Beats me, but he had his emergency lights on nevertheless. Here's a police tip -- if you don't need your emergency lights, DON'T USE THEM! Your lights do nothing but attract idiot drivers like the one who was in front of me. Turn the damn lights off, do what you got to do, and get the hell on down the highway!

When You're a Cop, Following the Law Is Optional.

Back in January, I featured a blog as part of my Grinding My Gears! series entitled Lane Thieves. I discussed the tendency of many drivers I encounter at intersections to steal the lane, thereby occupying one lane as if there were two. I also discussed the potential danger this creates. Today's blog is a small addendum to that original article.

This past Saturday, I encountered a local deputy sheriff whom performed this very act. While stopped at a four-way signal light with a single lane, a deputy in a marked police cruiser passed me on the right, occupied the edge of the lane and part of the shoulder at the intersection; he obviously wanted to turn right. He was so close to the right side of my vehicle that I could see the images on his laptop screen. I was turning right as well and had my turn signal activated. A vehicle was coming from my left towards the intersection (they had the green light), so I was yielding to them before turning right. Before that vehicle could pass through the intersection, this deputy had pulled beside me and whipped ahead. In doing so, he not only illegally passed me on the right, but also cut the oncoming vehicle off and caused them to have to slow down. This deputy did not have his emergency lights activated, nor did he engage a siren. In short... he was just being an impatient douche bag with no regard for the law he supposedly upholds.

What if I hadn't seen the deputy and attempted to complete the turning maneuver to the right? He would have caused me to hit his vehicle, hence why you're not allowed to pass a vehicle on the right in the United States. What if the oncoming vehicle from the left couldn't slow down in time and rear-ended the deputy's car? This officer of the law created the potential for not one, but two vehicular accidents.

It's no surprise that drivers in North Carolina are so terrible. Even police officers fail to follow the rules of the road; neither do they enforce the law. The cops are bad drivers. The citizens are bad drivers. Nearly everyone in North Carolina is a bad driver!

To put it mildly -- many cops are just vulgarians with a badge and a superiority complex. You know it, I know it and they know it.

A Prick in a No Parking Zone.

As some of you may have read earlier in the week, I had a trip planned for today. I awoke at a brisk 4 AM this morning in preparation for a drive to Charlotte, North Carolina. I had a toy and hobby show to attend at 9 AM and an early start was required. Alternatively, it was nice to take the new Jeep for a long drive and prove its mettle. Though, this has nothing to do with my article this evening.

Instead, I turn my focus to a single photograph.

I snapped this photo while in the Cheshire Place Shopping Center on WT Harris Boulevard in Charlotte this morning. The green Buick you see in the center of the photo had just insanely whipped in front of me after blowing through an intersection. After cutting before me, he hurriedly slammed on brakes and parked in this No Parking zone. While not something I welcome, encounters with terrible drivers are nothing unfamiliar to me. Nay, what particularly perturbed me about this incident was the rush to plop his vehicle in a clearly marked No Parking zone.

Let's evaluate what the problem is...

You see, almost all retail businesses, restaurants, etc. have a No Parking zone in front of their establishment; it's required by law. As such, they are appropriately signed to let drivers know not to park there.

These placards do not take into consideration assholes like this guy.

Instead of parking in the parking lot like all the other customers, this guy decided that putting his vehicle in the No Parking zone was the appropriate place to leave his car. I mean... why read the sign that's on the building? Much less... WHY READ THE FRICKIN' NO PARKING SIGN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR CAR ON A BRIGHT ORANGE HAZARD CONE?!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

It's unfortunate that this business has been forced to put cones in the No Parking zone just to keep pricks like this guy from parking there. But, it's obvious that even the brightly-colored cones aren't enough to prohibit such callous and disrespectful behavior.

And this, my friends, is where I make my point.

In one photograph, I have somehow elegantly surmised the pitiful state of our dear nation. I got lucky, no doubt about it. The truth contained within is stark. Americans have become impertinent, negligent and altogether arrogant.

The hazard cone tactic has obviously failed. There's only one logical response.

Lethal, genetically modified giant guard scorpions.

Grinding My Gears! - Unobservant Pedestrian Shoppers

Have you ever noticed those people whom always seem to walk aimlessly into oncoming traffic when exiting a department store? Trust me -- I HAVE.

Hold the phones, it's...

Today's installment of Grinding My Gears! is all about Unobservant Pedestrian Shoppers. We all know them and we've all dealt with them. Some zeppelin-sized pussbag with three kids in tow will waddle out the front door of your local Wal-Mart or Target. You're driving by trying to find a parking spot (because you're not parking in the fire lane like the rest of the local scum). And of course, without any sense of their surroundings, those fools fail to look both ways and meander right in front of your vehicle. As expected, they take their time when walking in front of you. Big Momma in her pink sweats has to check her Facebook, you know! And those kids... they seem to run every which way BUT away from your vehicle. It makes me want to scream!

AAAAHHHHUUUUUGGHHHHHAAAAARRRRGGHHHH!

Why can't people just look both ways before walking into traffic? I realize that cars have to yield to pedestrians. That's a rule I fully agree with. Yet, doesn't some sense of personal responsibility enter into the equation? Whenever I walk out of a department store or shopping center, I follow a few simple steps.

1. STOP
2. LOOK LEFT
3. LOOK RIGHT
4. DECIDE IF WALKING WOULD IMPEDE TRAFFIC
5. GO WHEN I HAVE AN OPENING
6. WALK BRISKLY TO CROSS THE TRAFFIC LANE

I mean really folks... it's that damn easy. Sure, a vehicle technically has to yield to me if I walk in front of them... but it doesn't mean I should go without judging my surroundings first. Isn't it rude to just walk thoughtlessly in the way of other people? Much less, should you heedlessly enter into a lane of traffic with giant metal bricks on wheels zooming towards you? What if a driver doesn't see you? Did you ever consider that you might just be road kill for the buzzards?

No, you didn't... you're an aloof pinhead.

I can't even begin to count the number of boneheads that have walked in front of my car without so much as looking up and noticing I was there. It's a good thing I was paying attention because they sure as hell were not. Their mobile phone is the usual culprit, but not always. So often I see moms messing with their kids and completely neglecting to insure that it was safe to cross the road. Other times, it's folks shoving coffee or food into their face. Can't that wait until you get to your car?

New flash you morons -- just because drivers are instructed to yield to pedestrians doesn't automatically insure your safety! 

Need proof that more pedestrians are being killed in accidents with vehicles? Take a look at the most recent 2012 National Highway Traffic Safety Administration report on pedestrian fatalities. For many years now, pedestrian deaths as a percentage of total vehicle accident fatalities have been steadily rising. In 2012, there were over 4,743 pedestrians killed in vehicle collisions. I'd bet good money that many of those deaths could have been avoided if the pedestrian involved had been more aware of their surroundings.

So there you have it. When you're walking out of a shopping center and going to your vehicle in the parking lot, please be attentive. Look around you. Wait for nearby vehicles to pass before entering the crosswalk. Be courteous of drivers and show them some respect, just as they show you respect.

Because let's face it... if the rule of law wasn't in place, I'd have run you over a LONG time ago. That's the only thing protecting you from me.