Showing posts with label women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label women. Show all posts

Monday, April 11, 2016

Using Breasts To Sell On eBay.

If you're an online retailer like myself whom happens to sell items on eBay, then you know all about the stiff competition that's out there. If you don't price your products competitively and offer comprehensive descriptions of your items, then you're probably not going to make a sale. Then again, competition keeps sellers honest and the best retailers eventually rise to the top.

And then you've got total assholes that pull stunts like this...

(Click to enlarge)

This seller is one of many that are participating in a new trend on eBay. A trend that relies upon the lowest common denominator to attract male buyers with titillation. There's nothing special about the products these sellers are trying to make a buck on; they're just like the items being sold by any other seller. Nope... all these knuckleheads are doing is using a cheap method of catching a potential buyer's attention. It's absolutely pathetic.

They're using breasts to sell video games, comic books and other geeky collectibles to sex-starved nerds.

What I can't decide upon is who is more pathetic: the sellers using boobs to sell products, or the buyers purchasing the items because they saw a few inches of cleavage rubbing against their future prized possession. Honestly, what exactly do breasts have to do with Pokémon cards and video games? Absolutely nothing, that's what. These sellers are simply being sly in how they draw in customers.

Durhhhh.... boobies on a Double Dragon cartridge. I'll buy it! Duuuurrrrrhhhhh!

Even worse, I don't understand the mindset of the women whom allow their natural assets to be used in such a depraved manner. I'm no prude, but this is demeaning to every woman that's fought to be treated as an equal. Such a practice reduces women to nothing more than being objectified and/or fetishized, with one sole purpose... SELL SELL SELL!

Over the past few years, I've seen this trend gain steam. Some of the items I've seen displayed with a set of breasts include Super Mario Bros. video games, X-Men action figures and GI Joe toys. Unfortunately, I don't think there's any end in sight.

Thursday, September 24, 2015

Bluebeard's Wife - A Call For Depicting Women Positively In Literature.

In the fairy tale Bluebeard, a young woman marries a wealthy baron surrounded by a cloud of mystery. All of his past wives have vanished, with no explanation from the titular Bluebeard himself as to their whereabouts. At first, the young maiden is disgusted by Bluebeard and his azure facial hair. Though, by spending vast amounts of money upon her and throwing a raucous party, she soon comes around to his offer of marriage.

Bluebeard gives his wife the keys to his castle. -- Gustave Dore, 1862

Upon completing their vows, Bluebeard leaves his wife alone in his castle. He explains that he must travel to attend to personal business. Bluebeard gives his bride a giant ring of keys, which open every room in his castle. Within these rooms are treasures beyond belief. Yet, Bluebeard makes one request of his wife -- there is one specific room she must never open. Of course, curiosity gets the best of the woman and she unlocks the forbidden room with its respective key. To her horror, she finds the bodies of Bluebeard's past wives hidden inside! Their blood has clotted all over the floor and been scattered across the walls. In her moment of shock, the wife drops the key to the room in the dead wives' blood. By some magical means, she is unable to wash the blood off the key. Without explanation, Bluebeard returns home the next day and asks for his keys. Herein, he discovers his wife's transgression and attempts to kill her, thereby adding her corpse to his collection. At the very last moment, the woman's two brothers burst into the castle and slaughter Bluebeard. The murderous villain's wealth passes to his young wife, whom uses the fortune to pay for her brothers' captains' commissions. She also finances a large dowry so that her sister can finally be married. Finally, Bluebeard's widow marries another wealthy man, whom takes care of her for the rest of her life.

I am both drawn to and disgusted by the tale Bluebeard. Not because I like fairy tales involving dead wives or men with interesting beards, but because this story serves as an important reminder. The entire narrative exists as a means to paint women as untrustworthy, shallow, gold-digging damsels in distress. At no point throughout the story does the wife do anything positive. She at first brushes Bluebeard off because of how he looks. Only after having wealth and excitement lavished upon her does the girl agree to be Bluebeard's wife. Upon inspecting all of Bluebeard's gold, jewels and treasure in the castle, she still has to have more. Her curiosity to open the final room is just too much. She proves to be a jealous snooper with little regard for consequence. Obviously, the wife must be rescued by her two brave brothers; she takes no steps to save herself from a gory fate. In fact, the story is so anti-woman that it doesn't even give the wife a proper name!

Bluebeard preparing to murder his new wife. -- Frederic Lix, Late 19th Century

If there's one thing I've never been ashamed to admit, it's that I'm a colossal proponent of women. They deserve better than to be wilting damsels that are wholly dependent upon men. Nor do they warrant the stereotypical depiction of a meddling, greedy gold-digger; that's completely ridiculous. Bluebeard's wife is perhaps the most hackneyed literary representation of a woman that I've ever read. And yet, that's why the fable of Bluebeard is so important. To understand what women are, you have to comprehend what women aren't.

Women are not superficial.
Women are not greedy.
Women are not weak.

As both an avid reader and a writer, I use Bluebeard's wife much like a barometer of feminism. In reality, women are powerful, independent creatures of magnificence that don't ever need a man to find success and happiness. They deserve to be celebrated in literature, much like Lewis Carroll's Alice or Daniel Defoe's Moll Flanders. A resourceful, self-reliant woman can guide the reader past any obstacle imaginable. Through her leading example, the reader can aspire to become a better person -- woman and man alike.

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

New Methods Of Marketing Pumpkin Spice To Women.


Let's face it -- chicks love pumpkin spice.

With Autumn right around the corner, women everywhere are crying out for the perennial Fall favorite. From the local coffee shop to donut shack and every retailer in between, pumpkin spice is a virtual gold mine in the lead up to the holiday season. This got me to thinking... other than air fresheners and candles, what other products could be blessed with the flavorful goodness of pumpkin spice?
  • Pumpkin Spice Shampoo: Imagine lathering up your hair with some inviting orange shampoo. Instead of the typical bland stuff that smells like rain or tsunamis or some crap, what if your shampoo left you smelling like a Starbucks in October?
  • Pumpkin Spice Pizza: I know you're probably saying yuck, but listen to me. What if Pizza Hut or some other major pizza retailer developed a pumpkin spice dessert pizza? The crust could be made of the same dough used for cinnamon buns. Layer a pumpkin spice creme with caramel and bits of cinnamon. Top it off with warm streusel. Oh man... that's making me hungry!
  • Pumpkin Spice Toothpaste: Brushing your teeth never tasted so wonderful!
  • Pumpkin Spice Christmas Trees: This would be pretty easy to pull off. Many faux Christmas Trees these days come with pre-installed lights. Using that same technology, scent-releasing oil warmers could be built into the branches and release the alluring aroma of pumpkin spice. Oooooh, but I'm not done yet. Want your real Christmas Tree to smell just as lovely? Use a special pumpkin spice mixture in the water you pour into the base of your tree. The tree will absorb the scented water and release it into the air. Genius!
  • Pumpkin Spice Tampons: This one is pretty much self explanatory. Moving on.
  • Pumpkin Spice Fabric Softener: Screw Fresh Cotton and Lavender Loft... let's get your laundry a scent upgrade!
  • Pumpkin Spice Sugar Wafers: We all grew up with the regular chocolate and vanilla flavored wafers. Kick things up a notch with an explosion of sweet pumpkin spice creme. BAM!
  • Pumpkin Spice Fireball Whisky: When it comes to drinking alcohol, college girls love them some Fireball. Really want to move some bottles off the liquor store shelves? Create a pumpkin spice variant of Fireball that the frisky co-eds will absolutely LOVE! Imagine the excitement that will ensue with a bottle of Pumpkin Spice Fireball and a group of your favorite sorority girls!
Tell me what you think. Do you have any ideas for pumpkin spice?

Monday, July 20, 2015

The Government Doesn't Care About Rape (Because It's Run By Men).

A standard rape kit.

NBC News reported this week some alarming statistics about rape. Upon an analysis of roughly 1,000 police department entities across the United States, they found over 70,000 unprocessed rape examination kits.

Here's the kicker -- there are over 18,000 police departments in the United States.

Those 1,000 police departments represent a paltry 5% of all American law enforcement bodies. If that average holds true for the other 95% of police departments, that means there's probably one million or more unprocessed rape kits spread from coast to coast.

Wrap your head around that number for a minute, folks.

1,000,000.

That's 1,000,000 rapes. 1,000,000 instances of violence. 1,000,000 predatory acts going unpunished. Countless droves of rapists walking the streets, with no sense of accountability. 1,000,000 women with no support from the justice system, which supposedly has their best interest in mind. 1,000,000 women forced to endure an invasive and painful rape kit examination. All for nothing.

A literal mountain of rape kits, sitting unprocessed in a warehouse.

Currently, a rape kit will cost about $1,000 to fully process, from start to finish. Sure, processing 1,000,000 rape kits all at once would cost a whopping billion dollars ($1,000,000,000). Let's compare that number to what our government has spent on other more useless things, though.
This doesn't even take into account the fact that the rape kit backlog goes back as far as TWENTY YEARS in some places! You mean to tell me that over two decades, our government couldn't find a billion dollars worth of change in the proverbial couch? Give me a frickin' break.

There's only one reasonable conclusion to be drawn from these figures. It's not that we can't afford to process the shameful flood of unprocessed rape kits...

Our own government simply does not give a damn.

Why? Because it's run by men. Unfortunately, women represent only a fraction of our elected government officials.
  • 19.4% of Congress
  • 24.8% of all State Governors
  • 24.2% of all State Representatives
  • 17.6% of all Mayors
I can wholly guarantee you this -- if women properly represented half of all government officials (they make up 50.8% of the total population), that backlog of rape kits would not exist. This isn't a matter of being a feminist, or supporting equal rights for all (which I do). It's merely common sense. Men can be aggressive assholes; just ask the women they rape. Over 93% of all perpetrators of rape are men. I'm not saying every man elected to a government office is a rapist -- far from it. What I am saying is that without an equal number of female voices to address the concerns of women, our government will continue to not do anything about rape.

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

2015 Miss USA Pageant Earns Lowest Ratings Ever.

The night of Sunday, July 12 saw the latest installment of the annual Miss USA Pageant. The event, which aired on the Reelz cable network, drew only 925,000 viewers. This marks the lowest ratings numbers the program has ever had. Admittedly, the program was held on a third-class cable channel. The Miss USA Pageant normally airs on NBC, but they recently cut ties with Donald Trump, whom owns a stake in the pageant. Honestly, I suspect the low numbers for the pageant can't wholly be attributed to its move to cable.

As the old Bob Dylan song goes... The Times They Are a-Changin'.

2015 Miss USA Winner Olivia Jordan of Oklahoma.

The pageant saw its best ratings nearly four decades ago. In the 1970's, the Miss USA Pageant easily earned 40 million viewers per telecast. Though, the ratings for the pageant have been in steady decline since then. Last year, the ratings were definitely better than this year -- 5.5 million. But, you must consider that the 2014 edition was broadcast on a national over-the-air network. Essentially, it was free. Beggars can't be choosers for content, am I right?

Americans have been in the process of moving on from beauty pageants for a long time. Less and less, women are objectified as hollow know-nothings. A pageant dedicated to women strutting in bikinis, evening gowns and answering softball 'world peace' questions simply doesn't work in the modern world. Women are more than just objects of beauty... and they shouldn't be treated as such. Pageants represent a time when women weren't respected as equals to men. Honestly, I'm surprised the notion of beauty pageants has lasted this long.

I feel compelled to point out that while I find the concept of a beauty pageant to be archaic, the contestants are largely intelligent, hard-working, motivated women with a drive to succeed. The contestants recognize a path to earning notoriety, opening business opportunities and continuing their education -- I simply can't fault them for that. I just find it unsettling that the contestants have to render themselves to the lowest common denominator of existence -- letting judges decide who looks better in a bathing suit. Give me a frickin' break!

If beauty really is in the eye of the beholder, how can there be any sort of an objective beauty pageant? It just doesn't make sense.


Friday, June 5, 2015

8 Out of 10 Malala Shooting Suspects Secretly Acquitted.


I have a bit of troubling news to share with you concerning Nobel Prize laureate Malala Yousafzai, the young Pakistani girl who took a brave stance against the oppression of the Taliban; a position that nearly ended her life. She has served as a beacon of freedom for people all around the world, but especially for young girls under tyrannical Muslim governments. On October 9, 2012, Malala was shot in the face by a Taliban gunman after she boarded her school bus. At age seventeen, Malala is the youngest ever Nobel Prize recipient. To this day, she continues to fight for equal access to education for all children. The world as a whole owes Malala a massive debt of gratitude.

As pertaining to the assassination attempt, the Pakistani government would later claim to have secretly prosecuted ten men involved with the plot. In April of this year, information was leaked that all ten men were found guilty and sentenced to life imprisonment (which is only 25 years in Pakistan).

That information has now turned out to be false.

Only two of the ten men named in the trial show evidence of actually being incarcerated. The other eight defendants were apparently acquitted of all charges. Those eight men have since vanished. In fact, there is now some doubt that those men even exist. The two men whom do seem to exist are under scrutiny as well -- did they even have anything to do with the shooting? No one seems to know.

As to why the shroud of mystery has emerged, one must place blame on the Pakistan government. They failed to correct initial reports about the ten men being found guilty. Personally, this leads me to believe that the initial leak was all just a ruse. Nor did the Pakistan government maintain any record of the trial itself, which is rumored to have taken place in a converted hotel in the city of Paitham.

The government of Pakistan has clearly failed to find justice for Malala Yousafzai. Unfortunately, this is yet another reminder of how the rights of women are all but disregarded in many Muslim countries.

Friday, May 1, 2015

Living With A Strong Woman.

The Combat of Ares and Athena -- Jacques-Louis David, 1771

Living with a strong, independent woman isn't the easiest task in the world, but it is highly rewarding. You never have to worry about her being weak or undependable. A strong woman is able to take charge and do things her own way, no matter the obstacle set before her. As a partner, it can sometimes be strenuous to let loose the reins and allow someone else to lead the way. It's especially hard on a partner who tries to be a decent and confident leader in their own right. Typically, such partners want to play the role of the gallant knight and are willing to do everything for their princess.

Herein exists the major divide such partners must cross, though. A strong, independent woman is no princess. They're more like regal queens whom never need to be rescued. To be honest, they usually rescue the knight.

In order to have a healthy relationship with such a dignified and self-sufficient woman, here are a few pieces of advice that every partner should consider. Trust me... I speak from experience.
  • Never assume you have to do anything. A strong woman wants you to do things because you want to, not because she asked you. Ultimately, such a fine woman hopes for you to be just as independent as she is. She expects you to think for yourself and make decisions on your own.
  • Be prepared to defend your position. When you have a disagreement with a strong woman, she will never back down. If your idea or concept is favorable, then be prepared to show why without causing a fight.
  • If you do happen to get into an argument with a strong woman, sometimes the best course of action is to not say anything. Within such a woman is a fiery pit of determination. This can at times create unnecessary tension, especially if you also possess a highly determined personality. Just say "I don't want to fight" and walk away. Cooler heads will prevail soon after.
  • A strong woman will love you with everything she's got, to a fault. Even though she can take care of herself, that doesn't mean she's not vulnerable. Strong women are extremely loyal to the ones they love. Violate that loyalty and you'll break her heart...
  • ...by which she'll promptly break your face. Never, ever cross a strong woman. If you do, the probability of her accepting you back is extremely low. You should be very afraid of what's coming next. She's not going to accept your transgression so lightly. A wilting flower she is not!
  • True strength within a woman of such a high caliber is a treasure to behold. She can swing an axe, build a planting box, file her own taxes, bake a cake, drive for ten hours straight, fly a plane and sing like an angel... all before dinner time. Understand that she really does not NEED you to get by in life. Don't take it personally.
  • Concurrently, understand that she WANTS you in her life. For someone so special and talented to love you, that's the ultimate compliment.
  • When all else fails, just listen to what she's saying and go with it. A strong woman accepts that sometimes her partner's perspective is correct, but usually it is not. Many times, she'll even move ahead with her own plans without your input. In these moments, just listen to what she has to say. The trust you share in your relationship is critical at these junctures. The same faith that you put into your love must also be put into her. Let her lead and don't worry so much about following. A strong woman will never lead you astray.
The love of a capable, brilliant woman is something that will sustain you for a lifetime. Treat her like the wondrous, prodigal bombshell that she is. You won't meet another woman quite like her in all your years. I guarantee it.

Sunday, March 1, 2015

Domestic Violence - An Epidemic.

I realize that my blog more often than not discusses trivial matters -- my aggravation with other people, pop culture, history, science, telvision and so on.

Tonight, I want to speak with you directly about something serious. Please, allow me a moment of your time.


Based upon current statistics, one out of every three women has been a victim of domestic violence in some capacity. 29% of all women have been shoved, slapped or pushed by their intimate domestic partner. Approximately 25% of all women have been choked, raped, punched, slammed, beaten or burned. In total, nearly five million women are assaulted every year in the United States. By any reasonable definition, that classifies domestic violence as an epidemic.

Take a look at your female family and friends. Odds are, at least one of them has been or is currently a victim of domestic violence. Even worse, most victims will never openly discuss their abuse.

By age 17, 22% of female domestic violence victims have encountered their first assault by a partner. That number skyrockets to nearly 70% by the time they're age 24. Every nine seconds a woman is beaten. In the length of time it took me to write this article, over 225 women were victimized in the US.

Even worse -- since 2003, over 18,000 women have been murdered by their intimate partner. That's more than double the number of soldier deaths in the Iraq and Afghan Wars combined.

All I ask is that you consider the facts at hand. Domestic violence is a major problem in this country. If you know someone whom is a victim, but they're too afraid to come forward, be supportive of their situation and listen. Be there when they need help the most. Show them that there is always a way out of their predicament.

If you are a victim of domestic violence, I ask that you please seek out help. Your life is important. You do not deserve whatever form of abuse you are currently receiving. No one has the right to abuse you. You are NOT a victim.

I saw what domestic violence did to my own family. There's nothing more terrifying than seeing your own mother being struck by your father. Even worse... the cycle of terror is compounded when domestic violence spills over into child abuse. I speak from experience. Domestic violence is one of the few things in this world that I take a zero tolerance position on. There is never an excuse for raising your hand to a loved one. Never.

If you need help, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, or visit them at www.thehotline.org

Do not wait a moment more. Your life depends on it.